When you wake up in the morning, do you feel a smile reach your face, or a frown? Do you know what I have? I have the reality of Jesus Christ across my face. He is and has always been my “reason.” My morning air, my daily breath, my hope, etc.

Yet, faith in Jesus in my everyday circumstances can prove a challenge for me. I recently felt the Lord convict me that I want Him in heaven, but not on earth. Meaning, I want Him when everything is perfect but I don’t always want to follow Him in my day-to-day circumstances. The precipitated reflection for me, that culminated in a new reception of God’s grace. I needed His forgiveness.

I don’t exactly know if I’m an old Christian who has received new grace, or if I am a new Christian who has miraculously received grace. I believe God is merciful and honors our faith. But I confess a limited understanding of God’s grace for me, prior to this spiritual experience.

I understood the doctrine of grace. I had deep love for Jesus (more than I can say). But I was lacking in grace, and now I make it my intention to regularly—prayerfully, daily!—remember God’s grace for me and that He holds me.

This new understanding of grace has been so monumental that I wonder if God accepted my faith before it. But I did confess with my mouth that Jesus is the Son of God and believe God raised Him from the dead for the forgiveness of my sins. Yes, I did. I believed in His forgiveness with a simple faith. But did I grasp His grace for me like I do now? No. Do I grasp it yet? Not fully. Amen.